Old Ways
by junkieshepherd
Summary: An alternate ending to 13x01; taking place after Stephanie finds Jo at the hospital. (Everything other than the Jo story line will remain the same ie. Alex's confession etc) (Basically this story would slot in between episode 1 and 2 of season 13; I tried to make it all flow and make sense as best as I could) hope you like it! !trigger warning! Jo slips back to her old habbits
1. Chapter 1

After packing up the entirety of her locker; shoving as much as she could into her bag, Jo stood motionless for a moment, staring at the empty room. There were so many thoughts and emotions flowing through her body, she felt like she couldn't breathe.

Not knowing exactly what she was going to do next, she pulled out her phone and opened uber. She knew Steph would be gone for a while; relaying the story to Meredith and trying to set straight the assumptions that everyone had somehow jumped to. Upset and still drunk, she just wanted to get out of there. Not thinking, she punched in the address of the loft and waited outside.

Sliding open the door, she was hit with a strong smell of alcohol, making her queasy as she remembered the mess of the night she had. She still wasn't entirely sober, but now the room had stopped spinning she could finally take everything in. She sat down on the edge of her bed, staring at the wall for a moment before bursting into tears, covering her face with her shaking hands.

"This is all my fault." She mumbled to herself in between sobs. Her hands moved across her face, wiping the tears while she tried to slow down her breathing. Her mind was racing. She wasn't thinking straight. Tears continued to roll down her cheeks; a fact she was completely oblivious to with everything else going on.

'I can't believe I told him..' she thought, pushing herself up from the bed and turning her head to look at Deluca's blood which had now probably left a stain in their rug. She took a deep breath as all her racing thoughts seemed to clear at once, leaving only one remaining, which managed to slip out of her mouth without intention; "he's going to find me!"

She started to panic. Her body was numb. With shaking hands, she began to frantically search through her belongings. She had to run. It was what she was good at. She knew how to survive on her own. She was used to things not working out. Just like Alex said; it was easy for her to move on when things were bad. She didn't want to believe the things he had said before, but they were doing a good enough job of providing her with more reasons to run.

Suddenly realising that she didn't seem to be accomplishing much, she turned to see only a mess of clothes thrown on the floor.

"I can't do this. I can't" she said to herself in one short breath. Her efforts to clam herself down now seemed useless, as she was breathing must faster than before.

"it hurts... I can't! I can't!" she continued to cry to the empty apartment as her knees buckled beneath her. She fell to the floor, bringing one hand to her chest and the other on the floor in front of her.

"I can't breathe! I can't.. I can't breathe!"

Jo had seen panic attacks before, regularly; she was a doctor. She knew how to calm people down and exactly how hyperventilating would affect her body. But in this state, she wasn't thinking like a doctor. All she could think was that she couldn't breathe, she couldn't move.

Unable to calm herself down, she managed lay on the floor, in a hope that this wave of panic would end soon. She was physically and emotionally exhausted.

After what felt like a lifetime, she noticed her breathing had started to slow down on its own. Her mind however was still racing. The fight she had with Alex still playing over and over in her head, accompanied by flashes of Deluca's face being repeatedly punched by the man she loved. How could this have happened?

She lay on the floor completely still for almost an hour. Her shaking hands were soon paired with the trembling of her whole body. She was freezing, a sign that the alcohol was definitely wearing off.

Still exhausted, she decided she needed to get up, at least off the floor. She straightened her arms beneath her body, sitting up; a simple task which proved to be incredibly difficult in this state. Eventually she managed to pull herself back up onto the bed. She looked around the empty apartment; a place where she once felt safe, where she had finally made her own home, now felt so incredibly empty and full of fear and hate.

Leaning across the bed, she grabbed the glass of water she had earlier rejected and had a sip. She was back to thinking slightly more like a doctor now and knew water would do her some good. As she placed the glass back down, her phone screen lit up, along with a buzz. It was Steph.

"7 missed calls.. Calm down Edwards" she said to herself, forcing sarcasm in an attempt to make herself feel a little better.

Although she knew her friend was probably worried about where she had taken off to, she didn't feel like talking. Clicking the end call option, Jo opened up her messages and began typing to her friend.

 _'Steph, please stop calling. I'm okay now. I'll talk to you later.'_ She pressed send and put her phone on the bedside table, with the screen facing down.

Although it may have been a little rude, Jo really wasn't in the mood for talking, she didn't want to risk blurting anymore of her history to anyone, even if it was her best friend.

Completely exhausted and emotionally drained, the puffy eyed, brunette collapsed backwards into the pile of pillows and blankets on her bed and fell asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

_**TRIGGER WARNING;**_

 _ **self harm and suicide content**_

"please! .. please! …. STOP!"

Jo felt her eyes snap open, as she sat up in her bed. She could hear her heart pounding in her chest and sense the sweat covering her body. She buried her face into her hands.

"Just a dream." She muffled.

Catching her breath, she looked around the apartment; the empty bed and blood stained floor made it almost impossible to feel like the happy safe home she had created. All of this was so triggering for her; bringing back so many bad memories.

She turned to check the time; 2:52am.

"perfect." she said to herself, rolling over to her side and lying back onto the damp sheets. She felt her eyes once again fill with tears; now completely sober and painfully aware of everything that had happened. She sighed as a tear rolled across the bridge of her nose and down her face, making a small wet patch on her pillow. She sniffled, rolling onto her back and wiping her eyes.

She lay still for a moment, before quickly deciding she didn't want to stay in the bed she had just made uncomfortable with her nightmare sweats.

Making her way into the bathroom, she stopped suddenly when her eye caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror. Her hair was a mess, her eyes puffy and still covered with running mascara; despite her best efforts to clean herself up earlier.

Deciding to freshen up before heading back to the couch for the rest of the night, she unbuttoned her shirt once again; remembering the events which followed these same actions only hours before. As she took off her jeans she looked up again at the mirror. Turning slightly to the side, she gently shifted the band of her underwear, revealing a small white scar on her hip.

She sighed as she placed her palm over the scar, closing her eyes and remembering a time in her past in which she had tried so desperately to forget.

She must have only been 15 or 16 at the time. Things were rough back then. She was surprised Alex had never asked about it before; she knew he had seen it. A part of her liked to believe that he knew exactly what it was from but didn't have the heart to bring the conversation up. He was like that.

Although Jo didn't exactly have the easiest life, she had only ever resulted to hurting herself that one time, and had sworn to herself she _never_ would again. But in that moment, just for a second, her mind slipped, only for a second. But that was all it took.

'Maybe.. Just once more..' she thought to herself.

She was a doctor now. She couldn't really do too much harm.. right? She just needed something; A moment to forget everything that had happened with Alex. A moment to stop thinking about the rumours that would already be circling the hospital by now. And a moment to push aside all of the anxiety of her ex finding her.

"I'll be fine." She convinced herself, searching through her bag containing the bulk of her resident locker. Her hands started to shake slightly again as she pulled out her medical bag. She unclipped the bag and looked inside at the scalpel.

"Well.. here goes nothing." Her voice was shaking. She knew deep down that she shouldn't risk it, especially after the night she had had, but the very fact that she was already distracted convinced her to follow through.

Jo, now standing in the kitchen wearing only her underwear, placed her right leg slightly in front of her. She figured she should do it somewhere no one would see, at least no one but Alex; that way she could avoid questions. Lifting the scalpel and taking a deep breath, she ran the blade across the top of her thigh, pushing down only slightly. She bit her bottom lip as her leg started to sting. Looking down she saw the blood making its way to the surface and forming bright red droplets on her skin.

She hadn't used too much force with this cut; she knew the amount of pressure needed to really do damage and that wasn't something she was interested in doing.

'That wasn't too bad' she thought as she watched the blood collect and start to run down her leg. Suddenly something took over her, almost like something snapped in her brain. Without registering what she was doing, she started to repeatedly cut her skin; perfect horizontal lines down her thigh. Each time the cuts got slightly deeper.

Before she knew it, her whole leg was covered in blood, running down her leg and forming a small puddle on the floor. She never wanted to take it this far, but she couldn't seem to stop herself. With every cut she would be reminded of what she was trying to forget, only causing her continue what she was doing, with her best efforts to distract herself.

The cuts were getting deeper and deeper, while Jo seemed to be shutting down a little more each time, despite the incredible amount of physical pain she was in. Suddenly she found herself dragging the blade across the inside of her left forearm, about two inches from the base of her palm.

Lifting the blade and re-positioning it a little further down her wrist, something clicked… what was she doing?!

"Crap.." she said, the scalpel slipping out of her hand as she snapped out of her emotional daze. Blood started to almost pour from her skin while she immediately placed her hand over the fresh wound in some attempt to stop the bleeding.

She stumbled over to the kitchen counter, the cuts on her thigh still bleeding, but she couldn't think about that right now. Her hand was covered in blood. A lot of blood. Terrified, she grabbed a dish towel from the counter and did her best to apply pressure.

'What did I do.. what did I do?!' the words echoed in her mind as she looked down at the cuts on her thigh. What did she do? She wasn't meant to hurt herself this much. Most of the cuts were definitely deep enough that they would need stitches.

Jo stood trembling in the corner of the kitchen, her hands violently shaking as her eyes darted around the room. The young surgeon seemed to have once again forgotten how to think like a doctor.

As she started to feel dizzy and weak, she knew she needed to call someone. She managed to make her way over to her bedside table where she had earlier placed her phone. She picked it up with her right hand, pressing her bleeding arm against her bare stomach to hold the towel in place. She placed her blood covered finger on the button, lighting up the screen, showing the time as 3:39am.

There were no new calls; Steph must have got the message. Jo unlocked her phone and opened her contacts. She had to stop herself as she automatically searched for Alex's name. Making her way into recent calls, she discovered the last person she had called was Meredith. Although she did consider it, somehow she thought that wouldn't be a good idea again, presuming Alex would be crashing with Meredith. Her shaking hands found Steph's name and pressed call.

Blood continued to stream down her legs while she waited for an answer.

"Jo? What's wrong?!" Steph answered, sounding tired but concerned at the sight of the early morning call.

"I.." she paused; not knowing how to explain what she had done. "..Steph, I really messed up.." Jo said as she tried her best not to break down again.

"Where are you? I'll come get you." Jo could hear Steph scurrying through her things, probably looking for her keys.

"I'm at home." Her voice cracked as she looked down at the dish towel which was now soaked with blood.

"I'll be right there." Steph said, hanging up the phone.


	3. Chapter 3

_**TRIGGER WARNING;**_

 _ **self harm and suicide content**_

 **okay just a super short chapter. thank you guys for any reviews! i hope you've enjoyed reading so far and i hope you like this one too! i'll do my best to get the next part up asap :) :) :)**

"Jo?" Steph said anxiously as she made her way to the door of the loft. She knew something was up when Jo called. She was half expecting to find her drunk again. But never did she think she would walk in to what she did.

Sliding open the door, Steph felt her heart sink to her stomach as she saw Jo's seemingly lifeless body on the floor, leaning against the bed.

"oh my god." Steph dropped her bag in the doorway and made her way to over to Jo; her doctor instincts kicking in right away as she took off her jacket to use to try stop the bleeding.

"Jo, look at me..look at me." she had one hand pressed down on her jacket covering the cuts and used the other hand to gently lift her friend's head, forcing their eyes to meet. Jo was able to hold her head up, her pale face full of panic and her eyes filled with tears as she locked gaze with her best friend.

"Okay. Okay. You're okay." She moved two fingers to Jo's neck to check her pulse. It was weak but nothing life threatening. Not yet anyway. Steph tied her jacket around Jo's leg, her eyes never shifting from the terrified ones staring back at her. She could feel her own heart pounding but didn't want Jo to sense her fear. She had already lost Kyle and didn't know what she would do if she lost her best friend too.

"I'm going to get something to stop the bleeding, okay? Keep pressure on that." She said, her eyes suggesting towards the cut on her wrist. She knew Jo was in shock but figured talking to her like a normal person could help her to stay calm. Steph stood up, looking around the apartment. She ran into the bathroom and grabbed a towel which was hanging behind the door, along with as many hand towels she could find.

After tying the towel over her jacket, and the smaller towels around the bleeding wrist, Steph was finally able to take a second to breathe. The adrenaline running through her began to fade as she stared at the trembling body in front of her. Jo's skin was cold and pale, her colour not much in comparison to the white of her underwear. Her shaky breath seemed to be the only thing giving any life to her vacant expression.

"I'm so sorry." A voice mumbled, breaking the silence that filled the air and snapping Steph back to reality.

" I didn't-" Jo sobbed.

"shh, it's okay" Steph reassured, wrapping a blanket around her friend while she picked up her phone.

"we have to go the hospital-"

"No." Jo was barely conscious, but she was sure in this statement.

"Please. Don't."

As much as it broke her heart to see her best friend so broken and vulnerable, she ignored her pleads and dialled 911, shoving the phone between her shoulder and her ear while she wrapped her hands around Jo's wrist to keep as much pressure on the wound as she could.

"I need an ambulance. My friend tried to kill herself."


	4. Chapter 4

_**TRIGGER WARNING;**_

 _ **self harm and suicide content**_

 **so sorry this took so long! Hopefully you guys like this chapter sorry it's kinda longish. Thank you for any reviews i really appreciate them! let me know if you like this chapter too :) thank you! :) :) xx**

The ambulance doors flung open at Grey Sloan as the paramedics pulled Jo out, Steph right behind her.

"She needs .. She needs a suture kit and.. She .."

"Edwards! We got this!" Dr. Bailey and Jackson ran with Jo's gurney into a trauma room while Steph stood frozen outside, in complete shock. She wondered for a second how they were there so fast, or how they even knew, since the only person she had called was Meredith; but that thought soon slipped away.

"What happened?" questioned Meredith, running out to Steph, who still had barely moved an inch from the back of the ambulance.

"Edwards?" Meredith snapped, her hand grabbing Steph's arm.

"She was fine. She .. She said she was fine. I wouldn't have left her if I.. God! Why did I leave her?!" She rambled, throwing her head back causing the tears she was holding back to roll down the sides of her face as she took a few panicky steps towards the door.

"Edwards. This isn't your fault. No one could've seen this coming. You did the right thing. She will be fine." Meredith did her best to be supportive, knowing exactly what it was like to witness something of this nature.

After just over an hour had passed, Steph waited next to Jo's bed as she slept. Her wrist and thigh both stitched up and bandaged. She could hear Meredith and Bailey were outside the door arguing while they waited for Jo to wake up. She knew what they wanted. But there was no way she was going to let her best friend, the only one who had been there for her through the past 5 years, through all the ups and downs, be pumped full of drugs and sent to the psych ward. She just couldn't let it happen.

"I didn't.." A small voice came from the bed.

"Jo? You didn't? You didn't what?" Steph was so emotional and exhausted from everything that had happened, she wasn't sure how to react to an unfinished sentence from someone who only a few hours ago she didn't think she would even see again.

"I didn't try to kill myself. You said.. You told them.. You said I tried to kill myself. I didn't." Jo struggled to get the words out as she lay still, her eyes barely open.

Steph didn't know what to say. She was quickly trying to run through different scenarios in her head that would make her friend be telling the truth. She wondered if Jo was just trying to get out of the inevitable psych evaluation.

"You have to get me out of here.. Alex.. he.. he can't know I'm here." The brunette struggled and squirmed around in the bed, trying to sit up to leave.

"Just.. Don't worry about Alex okay?" Steph put her hand on Jo's shoulder, gently pushing her back down and handing her some water.

Once Jo had settled down again, Steph sat at the end of her bed and cleared her throat, taking a minute to prepare herself for what she was going to hear next.

"You need to tell me what happened. Everything." She stated in a confident voice despite what she was really feeling.

"Steph it doesn't mat-"

"No. it does matter. If you don't tell me what happened, they are going to send in psych. And we both know you won't want to spill the beans to them. And if you don't talk all they will do is send you upstairs and keep you there until you _do_ talk."

Jo's face suddenly went blank. She knew Steph was right, and she knew she definitely didn't want to spend any time in the psych ward.

The room was filled with silence while the two residents stared at each other; both just as terrified as the other. Jo wanted to tell Steph the truth, she wanted her to know the real reason all of this was affecting her so much, but she couldn't. She couldn't risk being found; putting herself and everyone she loved in danger.

"I was just upset." Jo finally said, her eyes moving to look at her hands as she nervously pulled and twisted her fingertips.

"Everything with Alex and .. I just needed a distraction. I didn't mean to go this far; it wasn't meant to be this bad" She continued, finishing her sentence looking back at the confused and concerned expression on Steph's face.

"This wasn't a suicide attempt. I'm _not_ suicidal. I don't need to be here; I _need_ to go home."

"A distraction!? Jo, this isn't what you do.. When you get mad you.. you drink, or you scream.. you don't …" Steph stopped herself and took a breath from her rambling. She glanced briefly at the bandage on Jo's wrist; remembering how much blood was pouring out of her body when she found her.

" _Is_ this something that you do? I mean.. how long has this been going on for?" she continued, this time in a much softer voice.

"No. No Steph, I-" Jo ran her hand over her forehead and through her hair.

"I mean.. when I was a kid; yes but.. no, I.. this was just the one time. I just needed something else. It was a _mistake_."

Steph stared at Jo, wanting to say something to make this okay. She was trying her best to understand where she was coming from. Even being a doctor and knowing people _did_ use this as a way to cope, it was never something she had understood.

She was also stuck with the dilemma of whether or not she would tell Jo about Alex's arrest. On one hand, maybe it would calm her down if she knew she didn't have to worry about him suddenly walking past and seeing her in a hospital bed. But on the other, she didn't want to say anything that could make this worse.

After a moment of silence between the two young surgeons, Steph stood up from the end of the bed and walked towards the door.

"I'm gonna go find Grey. I'll talk to her.. sort something out."

Jo was still facing the other side of the room where her friend had just been sitting. She nodded her head, acknowledging what Steph said, even though she didn't feel entirely comfortable with Meredith Grey being informed of the details of her breakdown.

Steph stepped outside, closing the door behind her. She found herself once again face to face with Meredith, who had been pacing outside Jo's room for the past 20 minutes while Bailey was off dealing with other patients.

"Well?" questioned Meredith, her hands moving strands of hair behind her ears. She too was in the same position as Steph; wondering what to do about Alex.

"It was an accident. She just needs to go home."

"An accident? Edwards, I get that you're trying to protect her but this isn't just her reputation we are talking about.. if she's .." Meredith paused. She could see Steph knew what she was going to say. She saw the look on her face as she thought about the idea of her best friend being suicidal.

"Bailey wants to send her to psych."

"I know!" Steph snapped back. She wasn't trying to be rude, but couldn't help the flood of emotions that were filling her body.

She took a deep breath while Meredith looked at her with concern.

"Look, she just.. she had a bad night. She can come home with me and.. I can watch her. It won't happen again." Steph said in a calm voice.

Meredith sighed as she tried to put her concerns into words. If this were any other patient she would have no trouble in voicing her doubts about the patient's mindset and safety. But this was different; she had grown quite fond of Wilson, and there was something about the friendship of the two residents that reminded her of herself of Cristina.

"Does she know about Alex?" questioned Meredith, trying to get as much information as she could before she even thought about confronting Bailey.

"No. I didn't think should say.. I mean who knows what she would do." Steph replied, instantly regretting her last words. There was no question she was worried about Jo and what she was capable of doing to herself, but she couldn't let her fear be heard; not when she was trying to convince everyone that her friend was fine.

"Well she has a right to know. Don't you think she would want to know?"

"I guess. I just don't want to risk upsetting her even more. Like I said she had a bad night." Steph knew it wouldn't be a good idea, not yet anyway.

Meredith took a few steps towards the window of Jo's room, crossing her arms as she looked inside.

"Well we are going to have to talk to Bailey at some point. We can't just run away with her."

Steph crouched down behind Meredith, rubbing her eyes before placing her fingertips on her temples.

"She needs to get her story straight." Meredith said, turning back around to face Steph.

"They only need to take her if this was a suicide attempt." She continued.

Stephanie stood up from her desperate position on the floor with a confused look on her face.

"Whatever happened tonight.. We need to get in there and make sure she knows what to say. She just needs to get through the psych evaluation." Meredith's protective instincts had fully kicked into gear now and she was purely thinking of what Alex would want.

"And then what? No matter how good her story is, they're not just gonna send her home. She cut herself.. _Repeatedly_.. I don't need to be a shrink to know that's not a healthy mindset.." Said Steph, confused by where the attending was going with this plan.

"Best outcome.. She's off surgery for a while.. a few therapy sessions until she gets cleared again." She tried to sound convincing and confident, remembering from her last few experiences that this wasn't always as easy as it sounded.

"okay. So we.."

"So we go in there and we figure this out." Meredith continued the resident's sentence and she pushed on the door handle and moved inside, allowing space for Steph to walk past her.

Steph took a deep breath before walking in, Meredith closing the door behind her.

"What's going on?" Jo mumbled with a terrified expression.

"We need to talk."


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry sorry sorry this took way longer than it should have! I hope you guys like the last part of this fic! And I hope you've enjoyed reading the story as a whole; it was my first time trying any type of fanfic so it was so amazing to have people say they liked it!**

 **THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND REVIEWS 3 hit me up if you have any ideas of anything else I could try because I really love doing this! xxxx**

It has been almost a week since that night. Tonight would be the third night Jo was staying at Stephanie's. She stayed in hospital for two days for observation and to keep her off her injured leg; although she was pretty sure Bailey was only keeping her there on some sort of suicide watch, since Meredith had helped her to avoid being admitted to psych.

Although Jo was extremely grateful for Meredith helping her, and for Steph giving her a place to crash, she just wanted things to go back to normal. Steph had suicide proofed her entire apartment, and never missed an opportunity to check Jo's body for any signs of harm. Meredith sent a text here and there, mostly updates on patients and cases she would need to catch up on. Jo presumed this was her way of checking up on her; she had never seemed like the affectionate type.

There was still no word from Alex. Jo had agreed to let Meredith tell him what happened after she bailed him out; mostly because she didn't want him to hear the story from anyone else. She felt it was best they weren't speaking; for now anyway. He did walk out after all.

"Hey." Steph announced as she walked through the door holding a bag of takeaway.

"You know I can feed myself." Jo said as she looked up from her curled up position on the couch. Steph had been trying her best to be subtle but it was obvious from the past few days that she still wasn't satisfied that Jo was 'okay'.

"I know, dummy. It was just on the way home and I couldn't be bothered cooking. Shepherd is killing me with all these.." She stopped, not wanting to seem as though she were bragging.

"You don't have to do that. I'll be back soon. And then I'll be back to complaining about all my _amazing_ , groundbreaking surgeries too." Jo joked as she moved the blanket off her and stood up from the couch, making her way into the kitchen were Steph was setting down the bags of food.

An uncomfortable silence filled the room while the two residents both found themselves staring awkwardly at the floor.

"Have you heard anything yet? About when you'll be back." Steph asked reluctantly as her eyes quickly glimpsed at Jo's wrist to check for any new injuries.

"They said I should be back next week; as long as Bailey trusts that I won't cut off my arm or something if I see Alex." Jo replied sarcastically, trying to lighten the mood a little. Steph tilted her head as her brows furrowed. Before she could even open her mouth to respond, there was a knock at the door.

"I'll get it" Jo chirped, finding any excuse to get out of the conversation as she walked over to the door.

"Dr. Grey! Um.. hi.. what are you .." the confused brunette stumbled on her words while a wave of fear took over her body with the thought that Alex might have been with her.

"Alex isn't here. I just want to talk to you. Can I come in?" the attending asked, sensing the fear from Jo.

"Of course, yeh. Um.. Steph's in the kitchen." Jo said, moving aside so Meredith could walk through.

Stephanie, who had clearly been eavesdropping from the kitchen, rushed back to continue moving the plates onto the bench.

"Dr. Grey. Hi, we um.. we have Chinese." Even after everything, there was something about Meredith that always created a slight sense of panic amongst the residents.

"I'm not here to steal your food, Edwards, I just need to speak with Jo for a minute."

"Right of course. I um.. am.. being paged so.. I'm gonna.. go" Steph said nervously as she picked up her phone and jacket and made her way past Jo in the hallway, who knew full well that she wasn't on call tonight.

Jo took a deep breath and faked a smile as she sat down in the kitchen.

"What's up?" she asked, trying to sound calm.

"Look; I like you Wilson. And I know Alex loves you, and you're probably the best thing that's happened to him in a while. And you and I both know he's been through enough. So he _needs_ you to be okay, and that means I need you to be okay."

"..okay." Jo was trying to keep up with Meredith's rambling.

"I don't know if you and him can sort this out, or if things will ever be the same, but whatever happens, he will always need you to be okay." Meredith continued.

Jo wasn't sure how to respond. She sat silently and stared down at her fingers for a moment; trying to take in and comprehend what the attending was trying to say.

"What I'm saying is.. you can come to me. I want you to come to me. If you ever feel like you.. if you ever want to do that again, you need to tell me. I know life can .. it can really suck. But I need you to stick around. Okay?"

"Okay." Jo agreed. A slight smile flickered across her face as she nodded and pushed a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Okay." Meredith reassured, smiling back.

"Well, don't let that Chinese get cold." She added, suggesting towards the food which was still in the bags Steph had left on the bench before turning and walking back towards the door.

"Dr. Grey!" Jo called, jumping up from her seat and quickly following Meredith, who was already halfway out the door. Meredith turned and looked at Jo.

"Is Alex okay?" she asked, not sure what answer she wanted to hear.

Meredith smiled.

"He's okay."


End file.
